I remembered makingit so that he wouldn't respond this way unless my body was in a similarstate, but perhaps I was too tired to feel my own excitement. "Ohwell," I said to myself as I rolled back over, that was his problemright now, I was way too tired to have another go.The constant moans and vulgar declarations of my manufactured cousinand her stranger persisted, and with a dark satisfaction I found myselfbeing lulled to sleep. My dreams were a disarray of mean purpleshadows sucking light. "So how does that thing work?" he asked."I'll let you try it out," Jeremy said, walking over to the machine andplacing his hand on the pad. "You place your hand on the pad here, thenjust think of someone."Ryan came over and was about to move to the pad before Jeremy shooed himaway."It's a demonstration so I kinda figured I should pick," he explained,leaving Ryan a bit annoyed. "Alright, so go and place your hand on thepurple crystal on the side there," he continued."So what now?" Ryan asked,. “Mom, I’m not gay I’m bisexual.” I was hardly in the mood for being badgered especially in front of Donna. It was humiliating and I felt threatened along with utter embarrassment. Donna’s eyes feigned concern. But I knew mom was just being her usual dramatic self. “We’re not so sure.” Donna and I exchanged glances as mother continued. There was a hint of concern on her face, but mostly I saw compassion and a measure of understanding. This was no longer the 1950s and we lived in Chicago. “And. It was a Friday night in Evansville, Indiana and I couldn't get a plane out until morning. This was my fourth straight week on the road and I was relieved that I would get to spend a week at home. Not only was I weary, but I was in pain. I'd had a toothache for the last three days and today I'd picked up a prescription for Percocet and an antibiotic from a local dentist. Pain wears me out and affects my judgment. It's more difficult to concentrate through pain.The work was finished and I was.
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