You feel bad, you cut. You feel bad about cutting, you start to feel worse. And you cut again. And it keeps on going, and going, and going... It’s very hard to explain and incredibly difficult for people to comprehend but hurting yourself is very addictive. I have no idea why but that’s the only word that I can find to at least try to explain. People often mistake is as a suicide attempt but that’s just because the most common place to cut is arms. It’s not about dying, it really isn’t. . They were soft, silk like and stretched tight against my fit frame. I was so excited wearing them for the first time and couldn't wait to be with Brett again. I also has began fantasizing about him fucking me.I made my self a fake cock. I wanted to feel it inside me and imagine it was him. I stuffed a paper towel tube and placed a small foam ball on the top, like the head of a cock. I wrapped the whole "dildo" tight with a sock and rolled a condom down it. Now laying on my bed, I began rubbing. Suddenly the doorbell rang. She opened the door to reveal two men, Mark the landlord and Joe a handyman that worked for Mark. Cindy let them both in and they started looking around. They looked in every room and every closet to make sure the house was still in good shape. Cindy sat on the living room couch and watched TV during the inspection. After the two men got done looking around inside the house, Joe went to the backyard to look around outside and Mark came back to the living room to talk. I sat there and thought about the recent past to see if I could come up with some explanation that would have clued me in on what was going on with my wife. From what I had seen the previous night, things were not as I had believed them to be.I had been happy and I had always looked forward to getting home to Becky after a week on the road. I normally went on the road two weeks a month.Had this thing with numb nuts been going on for awhile or was it new? I would have to do some digging and try.
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